A Person Worth Remembering

It was a nice evening in Fresno---I don't know if there are any anymore---and we were having a dance at the stake center on north Cedar, not too far from the place he stayed in while going to Fresno State. The dance was outside in the patio on the south side of the building. (In fact, their wedding reception would later be held there. I sang for them "And This is My Beloved.") I had gone to the front of the building for a little fresh air and alone time and was sitting on the brick planter. This really good looking young man drove up and leaned across the front seat to talk to me. He had dark hair and dark sparkling eyes---and his shirt was unbuttoned, maybe two or three buttons.

He asked what was going on and I tried to explain to him. I invited him in to the building and told him a little about the church and invited him to church the next Sunday to meet with the missionaries. To my great surprise he came. He is five or six years older than me and so our age difference at that particular time caused a little alarm with my parents. Anyway, he listened to the missionaries, the things he heard rang true. He remembered that his mother had taken them to a Mormon church some where in his past.

He was baptised three weeks after meeting the missionaries. I remember that he contemplated serving a mission, but married Pat instead. And I moved away to go to BYU. Pat helped at my wedding reception several years later and because I am lousy at writing and staying in touch it was a long time after I left Fresno as a married woman that I had any contact with these friends.

I am a fool for punishment. Tomorrow I will again attempt to be a terrific substitute teacher. In the morning, at one school, I will have two classes of "gifted and talented" elementary school children. In the afternoon I will again play rotating sub in two classes --- two different grades. It worked ok last week so I have no reason to think otherwise for tomorrow.

A second grade teacher called this afternoon and asked if I would be willing to take her class for a week in February. I love to know this far ahead that I have enough work to keep me at the store, spending.

A two year old sang for me tonight "Baa Baa Black sheep na na na na more. Yessir yessir three bags four." I was giggling too hard to hear the rest but it was great. She was on one and sang several songs for us. Oh to have the candid camera crew getting all this down for posterity. Heck with posterity I want to see it again NOW so I can giggle some more.

Not bad for a Wednesday.

The lamppost

No one was there! I need to learn how to do the brown buttered popcorn. That and a handful of carmels would be a terrific treat! Bring on the next assignment!

I remember a YELLOW ROSE

More to the point I remember the man who graciously handed out the yellow roses. It took me a little time to appreciated this man with the white beard. But the more interaction I had with him the more I came to respect him. One morning in the spring my friends and I were walking. We came to his cul de sac and walked in, to the end, and back out. On our way in we passed this brother who was out tending his roses. As we came back out he came to the road and greeted each of us with a rose. No words that I can recall; but what a lovely yellow rose. I will remember the gesture and continue to revere this man as a gentleman.

I promised another little bit for today. On Thursday evening I was at a screening for another LDS Lives show, this one for a pretty flamboyant music person from the sixties and seventies. After the showing there was a little reception and I helped my brother-in-law put out the goodies, serve the cake and generally hang around. After quite a bit of time I gathered up my coat and purse and looked in my bil's direction (he was chatting with the "star;" she was the chatter. And I began to sing "So long, farewell" from Sound of Music. The "star" looked my way and said, "Is that a hint? Is it time for me to go?"

So very embarrassed I apologized and said no that I was just saying good bye to my bil. She quit talking and walked away. Oh my. I put on my coat and headed for the nearest stairwell and exit door. I hope my bil will still talk to me. (Secretly I am thinking he was glad to be interrupted. At least I am surely hoping so.)

On the not so secret side, I got the distinct impression today that the contention part of the lesson was being hurled in my generall direction. One would say I am too touchy. But I am thinking I have grounds. Yep.

A week? It's been a week? Yep, it's been a week. On a day when it was warmer and we didn't have rain yet, all of my lawn ornaments were removed hence and placed in the garage. Oops. Now they are in the way. Nevermind that I did not put them there. And I am afraid they will stay til I can get to them or HE will throw them out (where he would like them to be anyway). (Are you laughing yet?)

Next, I went to an elementary school as a rotating teacher for the afternoon of Thursday. 45 minutes in one class and 40 in the other. Easy dollars that day, but next time they will probably make me actually EARN the money. Mmmm. Then I was the PE teacher? Hah! We all laughed and maybe even scoffed. I was not sad that the fourth grade decided to go swimming and so two of my classes weren't. When it finally gelled the rest of the day went in an interesting and PE fashion.

On a sad note I have learned that an old friend is suffering from Parkinson's and is actually in a "home" which I have not found out the particulars about. He lost his wife a few years ago to small cell non cancer cancer. It got her rather quickly once diagnosed. I wish I could "be there for him" but not knowing how to get hold of him poses the main problem. So does distance, but I can write or call once I know.

So this has been a ... week. Not come see, not come saw. But only come.

When are we looming? You have not called.

This will make you smile anyway since I bombed on the laughter: I took my little granddaughter with me in the car last Sunday and when we turned the corner to the east she cried out: "Snowflake!" at my friend's wonderful "star above the treetops." Well, it made ME smile anyway. But grandmas usually do.

Well after a few days hiatus from this wonderful activity I sit down to tell you that a teacher from the banned school called tonight, just now actually, and asked if I could work for her tomorrow. Sadly, I told her I certainly could but that the principal had said I could no longer work at their school and I was sure that one or both of us would be shot if I showed up!

We had a very interesting commiserating conversation in which we discovered we thought the same about children manipulating the system and not wanting to try very hard to "get along in the world." Let someone else fix this for me. Even tho I am only in first grade I don't have to comply.

A few years ago I had the opportunity for the umpteenth time to sub in my friend's kindergarten class. The morning went along nicely for about an hour when a young man said to me "Could I call my mom?" "Don't you feel well, Adam?" "Oh, I feel ok. But my mom told me that when you are the teacher I don't have to be at school." Well, I called the mom and told her the conversation and she said, "That's right. Would you please send him out to the flagpole?" I told her that I could not do that. The school rule was that the parent had to come in to the office and check the student out. Ok was her reply and that was the end of my school relationship with that child, who thinks he doesn't have to try to understand people, or tolerate situations or simply learn to get along. Good for mom. I wonder if she really is the winner.

We all have "crosses to bear." I have so many that it's a wonder on some days I can move across the floor let alone across the driveway to my car. In fact all the crosses wouldn't fit in my car! But I do see the value in teaching children to tolerate, to understand, to get along with "outsiders." What am I thinking! I guess I should be shot.

Today began with a lovely cold walk with a dear friend. Minutes upon returning home I received the dreaded phone call from the principal! Yes, my services have been terminated at his school. Parents are calling. Children are afraid to come to school. I am really MEAN! No, it's the angry facade I showed and I guess I need to grow up. I am not smarter than a first grader!

Have a great day!

I have missed acouple of days, or maybe it was just a day and seems like a couple of them. Today I was in second grade and the class was pretty good. I went and stood outside the Wild Things class and listened to the teacher. She was great! The children were quiet and answering her questions with hands up first. I don't know what I did wrong that day. and now the principal is calling and I don't know exactly what he will say. The teachers I work for always say how glad they are to have me and that everything is in its place when they come back. Also, the lessons have been taught. I have great forboding over this phone call and I know it will come and I think I know what the end result will be. Ah, me.

My dad had a dr check up yesterday and there was a decision to do an abdominal CT scan. I am involved in almost all of his medical life. I think it's good to have someone consistently with you for many reasons, most people would know what those are. Except for some and tonight I was told that I go overboard for my dad and should expect one of my siblings to help, etc. But I know that I won't have him for a lot longer and if I spend some time with him, it really shouldn't affect anyone else, as long as I am not forsaking my "duties" (how I hate that picture!). I guess that somewhere in here I should indicate that dad is 93 and a half years old. If I live that long I hope someone of my progeny will want me around and be willing to care for me.

Maybe I should borrow some of dad's prozac. Things are a little bleak.

Boy, did I have a bad day at Bedrock today. The day was like a bad rendition of Where the Wild Things Are. And I know where they were today! One good thing was the assembly. Believe it or not. The man who presented is a wildlife catcher, marker and follower. I don't really know what his career choice is exactly. But for a living he goes to Africa, Australia, South America, etc., and helps control or other wise rid the inhabitants of unwanted wildlife. He was very interesting and his pictures were pretty awesome. Some maybe even gruesome. I go in to fourth grade tomorrow. Courage, Pam, courage.

Here I am again and I should be in bed!!! I was checking abc4 Good Things Utah and saw that there will be a bit on the show Tuesday about being rudely cut in front of in line at the grocery and I couldn't help but make a comment. Hooray! I am getting so brave. Good night. Courage to try to sleep.

I had a really difficult time dealing with today. Never do I have trouble sleeping. But last night I lay in bed for one and a half hours before I decided that was a waste of time. So I gathered my blanket and pillow and headed downstairs to read The Christmas Sweater, which I haven't finished yet. Still, the night passed in 20 minute snitches of sleep. Then I turned down a job and still had trouble getting on with the day. Tomorrow is not that kind of luxury so I really should be off to bed.

Another blogger said she had made a commitment to make and entry in her blog every day. That is how I have come to feel in the short week I have been doing this. And sometimes it is extremely inconvenient to take the moment to write.

Well, tomorrow is first grade, Wednesday is fourth grade and Thursday is second grade. Guess I should get as much rest as I can, eh?

Today was second Sunday dinner with all who can coming home for dinner and cake and ice cream to celebrate the birthdays of the month, i.e., January. There were for dinner only 17. For cake and ice cream we bump that up to 25. We had several sick and/or working and some who forgot. In the winter that makes us pretty close. But I don't mind. I like everyone coming home.

I had a hard time sitting in church today. I guess I am not very close to getting past the incidious incident yet.

This morning I received a late Christmas present from a daughter-in-law. It almost redeemed the whole season. I have read it over now many times and cried with each reading. The book is titled: "My Grandchildren 2008" and on each page is a picture of a grandchild and a note, where possible, from that child saying what they like about grandma. A seven and a half year old wrote, sic, "I like grandma becuse she always plans a day for a family get together so when pepole live far away we can see them and she makes the most delisuse food." A five year old wrote, "I like going to grandma's house because there are lots of toe's, and she is nice, and she loves me."

The others were also great! But this is why. This is why I do what I do and feel the way I feel. This is why. I pray that my Heavenly Father will bless these wonderful children. And that they will continue to grow and understand and know. Know that their grandma loves them. Loves them each and loves them all.

Today, I have spent time in fourth grade, time with my dad, time at a card class with wonderful friends, and time with one of my sons and his family. I haven't spent enough time on this new project, i.e. this blog. And now I am trying to plan dinner for Sunday for 20 - 25 people. Which is crazy even tho I do it every month because there is NOWHERE in this house for that many people to actually be let alone eat and have kids running around. But, you know, it's family and I usually stand a little back and watch and feel blessed that they are all here and will tolerate each other for just a little while.

One day I will get things together enough to pass out assignments for dinner and not feel obliged to do it all myself. It is very expensive to feed that many and also exhausting. Well, enough of that.

We made some really cute cards at our card class tonight. (Frankly, we do EVERY time.) What an island of enjoyment that is. I wander and am not keeping a thought very well so I am through for tonight.

I figured I shouldn't miss a day now that I've started this. So quickly before the midnight hour, I am in another fourth grade tomorrow. In a different school. It will be interesting to see if this group is as incapable as the last.

And today I was in kindergarten. I figured I could do it for a half day. Whew! Kudos to the regular teachers. There is definitely a different mindset needed for this age group. I am talking each time in relation to how they are in the classroom. I love finding out that I know the families of these children. When parents come to collect their kids I often have the privilege of saying, "I KNOW you!"

Oh yes. And I went walking this morning with my friend. We didn't go for too long as we walked outside. But it was long enough for me to find a piece of ice that didn't want to be walked on. And down I went. I am thinking that this is part of my weariness tonight.

Well, I tried to correct a spelling error in the last post and can't seem to figure it out so here is my mistake: digext should be digest. Thanks.

What an afternoon. All fourth graders - and fourth grades - are not created equal. It was amazing to me what these little critters couldn't do. Or more to the point, what they wanted me to do for them instead of them using their little brains and finding the answers for themselves. But I have seen it over and over again. In fact I will be in another fourth grade on Friday in another part of the county and I will see similarities.

I was reading chapters in a book to this little class today and there came a topic of parents loving their children equally or not. We talked for only a moment about this theme and decided --- well, I told them that I as a mother DO love my children equally. But that I love them in different ways. I will have to digext that one for a while. I know I have thought about it before. And frankly I would like to think that each of those boys thought I loved THEM the best, or most. That would indicate that I had spent some quality time with each of them singularly.

Today I have been thinking about what I could actually put here that might be uplifting and show that I am not always such a loser and negative. And the first thing I came up with was to mention my children. I have eight really nice boys. Six of them have brought daughters-in-law to the mix. All six have chosen wisely. I praise the mothers of those young women and thank them for the quality of persons they raised so that my sons would have the ultimate benefit.

Each of these men has a different and unique personality. I used to think that if you were raised in the same family in the same community that you would be more alike but that has proven not to be true. Similar in some respects. But not alike. We did scouting faithfully in our family. The boys each earned the rank of Eagle Scout --- sometimes under the tuteledge of their father as scout master, sometimes with others. We have heard what they learned from some of the scout masters and are glad their father was with them most of the time. I would hope that as they grow older and have opportunity that they will also serve in the scouting organization. Their father and I each have the Silver Beaver award and have spent many years even since their activity in volunteering. In fact, the dad is still working with scouts as a trainer and commissioner.

More later. The clock tells me I am almost late for my job.

I suppose I could get attached to this habit.I just need lessons on how to have a more comfortable blog. When do I get the lesson? Oh, wait. Maybe...

And it snowed all the day long. Whew!

It's glad I am that I don't have to worry about anyone reading this blog. Today the snow is so constant and two of ours have already been stuck in it that I don't seem to have the energy to go out and face the mess. But things could change.

I just had the occasion to read my friend's blog --- the one who said I should try this out. I will never be in her league. She writes funny, fun stuff. And besides that, she DOES the fun stuff. I sit here with necessity being the inventor of my daily life. And what a bore is that!

So today it took me all morning to get things together to face the recycler and other stops along the way til I got to dad's house. By then the snow was so bad that I couldn't bear to stay long with dad. I swept his walk and then bade farewell and went on home before it got too dark. I think we have about 15 inches of new snow in our yard just from the afternoon. I don't mind but the driving is difficult. Watch out for the loony birds who think they know how to drive in the snow!

It is the end of another Sunday, with some of the family coming over to hang for the night, play the Wii --- and eat, too, I suppose. I like the family around me but still find this chapter of my "book" to be a little confusing as I sort out the roles I play. Mainly, I need to fire myself from the self-appointed role of cruise director. It's time to quit. I am probably sea sick anyway. Daughter, sister, wife, mother, grandmother, aunt, great aunt, great grand aunt, sister-in-law, and other -in-laws. Friend, too.

School starts again tomorrow and I will be on call to substitute. I enjoy that title too ---substitute teacher --- which I have been doing for 30 years now.

So I have been told to create a blog and empty my ideas onto this page. I wonder what good it will do? But I guess I can join the hordes and give it a try.